Gratitude

No matter how great life is for someone, to them it's just their life. It's what they're used to. Sure they're aware of the good stuff, but cannot REALLY understand how lucky they are unless they lose everything. As for me, I know that I live a life of security, leisure and comfort. And in this dreary and depressing month of November, I am grateful for Thanksgiving; a time to reflect on one's blessings and show gratitude for them. I just gotta lay it all out for you today. So here goes:

• If there's a bug in my food, I can throw it out with no hesitation because there is ALWAYS more food to be had. That's no little thing.
  
  
• I wake up every morning with absolutely no pain in my body, thanks to my Tempur-pedic mattress and my good health.
  
  
• I have a fight with my husband maybe twice a year. It never lasts more than an hour and always ends with great sex. We are the best of friends. We consider each other's needs and make meeting them a priority. I HAVE A HAPPY MARRIAGE.
  
  
• Our last babysitter reported with wide eyed amazement that my children were the best behaved kids she had ever sat with in all her 17 years. They are delightful people who understand how to be polite, how to be kind, and why those things are important. I am very lucky to be the steward of such GOOD souls.
  
  
• My friends and I still have adventures that are reminiscent of the kind of silliness and independence that most people let go after marriage. Sleepovers, road trips, clubbing, themed parties for no reason… not many women in their 30’s have that. Much of the fulfillment I feel in my life comes from my incredible friendships and all the variety they bring.
  
  
• I found my niche at age 21. I know people who go through their entire lives bouncing from job to job, paying the bills, but not getting any enjoyment out of their work. I get absolutely giddy over a busy work day. I do a full on happy dance when someone with terrible hair needs me to fix it. I DELIGHT in that challenge and I love LOVE LOVE my job.
  
  
• Having just moved this summer, I’ve been faced with the potentially grueling task of settling into a new community. You wouldn’t believe how easy it has been for me. The people here are amazing. I feel completely accepted by my neighbors and by my new ward. This is exactly the kind of place I’ve always imagined raising my family. How lucky is THAT?!
  
  
• Actually, you know what? It’s not luck. It’s The Gospel. My faith has been directly responsible for every good thing I have listed here. I owe everything to that. On that note, our free country deserves a nod as well. I wouldn't have the blessings from my religion without the freedom to practice it.
  

Of course, while the big things in my life give me joy, it's the little things that make life really beautiful. Like soft, dry socks
cruise control on a long trip
a random Inside Joke Text from my BFF
digital cameras ... spontaneity ... spooning
the perfect pair of sunglasses ... laughing till I cry
breakfast for dinner … clean, white teeth ... clothing with a couture fit
a new haircut … a catchy melody … quiet eaters … a great idea
indoor plumbing … quotable one-liners … holding hands
an old pair of sweats ... a fort out of blankets
a night out … a soft kiss ...God-given gifts
a day at the beach … endless possibilities
bonding conversations ... dream chasing
family traditions … a familiar voice
an answered prayer

Remember the good stuff this weekend everyone. There’s lots of it.

Transformation 2008

Well, it's that time of year again. Time for me to make my obligatory color change. The dark has been delightful, but I am VERY ready to lighten up. In order to look like I belong among the living, I have to put on concealer, line my eyes, darken my brows and strategically apply a bronzer every single day. It always looks good in the end, but I'm ready for a more naturally flattering look. I called my usual person, who was going to charge me $125 an HOUR for the change that would certainly take a minimum of 8 hours from start to finish.


Weighing my options:
Get my hair done? Have Christmas.
Get my hair done? Have Christmas.

I opted for the cheaper, more difficult route of doing the color myself.

It was, however, logistically impossible for me to complete stage one without a competent set of hands. So I got a local stylist who was willing to use my color line and let me boss her around for the bleach and toning part of the transformation. She was very nice about it. It took about 4 hours and went exactly as I predicted, ending at a flat, brassy (but even) dark blonde. The perfect base color.


I would love to have gone straight home to add my high and low lights, but I had a date with Edward Cullen! So I took my brassy, unfinished head to the theater and met up with my friends for the Twilight movie. I should have stayed home with my hair.

The next day I applied a toner to get rid of the brassiness. I started adding dimension by taking the underside a shade darker,slicing some lowlighting through the sides, and highlighting around my face. All this I did working upside down, backward and blind. Though I actually let Shiney apply the toner to the roots at the back of my head. It took her an hour to cover 4 square inches, but she was very precise and did exactly what I told her. I was very proud.


I still have more high and low lighting to do and am in desperate need of a good haircut. But overall I'm pleased with my change. It brings the golden tones out of my skin, as opposed to the pink I've been seeing with the dark hair. This is the result to date. What do we think?

That crap movie I saw this weekend.

My expectations were pretty low, but I was feeling optimistic. I knew the production company was just starting, but I love new talent! I knew the director was a rookie, but so was Peter Jackson when he did Lord of the Rings! I also knew the budget was freakishly small and that was going to bother me. So I was expecting to give it a C+. 3 out of 5 stars. Something like that. And I was excited to see Edward Cullen in the flesh!

But Edward Cullen stood me up. Instead he sent this fugly, extremely constipated guy named Rob who didn't possess and ounce of Edward's charm and charisma. He acted like an overly awkward 7th grader around the girl he liked, and basically spent the entire movie brooding and sulking. I don't know what Bella sees in him. Though, if we're honest, our hot tempered, hyper-emotional Bella didn't show up either! Kristen Stewart left all personality at the door. She completely flat-lined the character, giving her the emotional expression of a garden gnome.

I get all fired up when I talk about this, so I'll say it once and I'll keep it brief.

The music? RIDICULOUS to the point of DISTRACTION. Like a cheesy Made-For-TV movie from the 80's. (except for the sensational Muse, played during the baseball scene)

The cinematography? PAINFULLY AMATEUR. I saw Twilight spoofs on YouTube that were done as well.

The Vampires? Alice and Emmett were OK, but everyone else was completely miscast. They were all stiff and unlovable. The villains were MAJOR over-actors. And I think Jasper might be Edward Scissorhand's long lost brother.

The script? Choppy and hollow. The most famous lines from the book were there, but sans the conversation that built up to those lines! Taken out of context, they were stripped of their meaning and left sounding completely phony. Lots of facts from the books were mentioned, but never explained. (such as WHY Edward's eyes changed colors)

I think my kid's monthly allowance might rival the budget for effects. The glittery skin? The red eyes that you could only see when the camera was an inch away? The cakey white makeup that stopped before the ears and showed every flaw on their skin? The lousy sound editing? And that's just the tip of it!

The worst thing on the table was the directing. Small budget aside, she could have directed the characters to have meaningful exchanges. Instead, each line was delivered like a high school play. She could have infused some warmth into the relationships. But everyone remained strained and awkward throughout the whole thing. She could have reminded Edward to 'smolder' a little, or to flash that famous crooked smile we heard so much about. I know Robert could have done it! But instead she kept saying,

"I gotta have more constipation intensity!"
"Give me WIDER eyes! I WANNA SEE THOSE WHITES!"

She had them all wheezing along in misery from beginning to end. The side characters were the only people in the entire production with personalities. (Mike Newton, Eric, Jessica, Jacob, and Charlie were great) I mean really, Catherine Hardwicke. Was your mom the only person in the test audience? Or did you just not show up to work that day. Because when the entire theater is pointing and laughing at parts that are meant to be cool or touching, something is definitely wrong.

And was is just me or was Charlie hotter than Edward?
Just me?
OK then.

Truthfully? I hope there is no sequel. I hope they let this one sit alone and then REMAKE it in a few years with a good cast, a competent director and a production studio with the means to make it what it could be. But even if they DO go ahead with this horrible cast and crew, the next one HAS to be better, because it DOESN'T GET WORSE.

Indulgence

It was the first day in my 71/2 years of being home that ALL THREE KIDS were in school. The sun had even come out to celebrate with me! I was a bit sulky about having to do something as mundane as grocery shopping on such a beautiful day. I was resentfully glancing over my 40 page dissertation (aka the grocery list), when I saw it. It was on the endcap of an isle that I have long since trained myself to ignore. There were hundreds of other rectangular objects around it, calling out to the masses with bright colors and clever marketing. This one called out to me from the deepest stores of my personal history.

Caramello.
Caramello!

I'm sure I've walked passed it once a week for my entire adult life, but it had never actually called out my name before. Well, maybe it had, but there's no way I would have heard it over the whining and begging that usually accompanies the grocery store experience.

I stopped. I turned slowly to face it; the warm brown color of the wrapper gleaming ever so softly in the harsh, florecent lighting of the grocery store. An involentary smile played at the corner of my mouth. I looked to my left. Then to my right. Then, like a kid who's trying to shoplift a verboten pack of gum, I snatched the candy bar off its shelf and tucked it underneath my bag of frozen peas.

At that moment, my entire shopping experienced changed colors. Instead of the flat, gray obligation that has always been the shopping list, I was in a world of neon. Every now and then I would peek at my forbidden treasure and grin sheepishly at the matronly woman next to me in the produce department. I whistled as I hefted boxes of Mac & Cheese into my cart. The cashier became my new best friend as we laughed together about things that weren't actually funny. I ran with the cart and jumped up on the lower basket, riding to my car like a teenager. I made silly faces at a little boy who was passing by as I unloaded my goods into the back of my *Audi TT*.

Then the moment came. I reached inside the last bag and pulled out my Caramello. I just looked at it for a moment as my half smile spread to cover my entire face. I sat down on my bumper and turned the bar over backwards.

"Maybe I'll find a golden ticket in here." I thought to myself as I gently scrapped my lower lip with my teeth.

Tucking my finger inside the paper, I tore it straight down the back and quickly peeled away the golden foil. The beautiful, milky brown of the chocolate made the glands in the back of my throat ache with desire. I pulled apart one little square and watched the honey gold strings of caramel fight to keep the bar together. I took a deep breath and looked at the sky as I placed it on my tounge. I didn't chew it. I just let it soften in my mouth, so I wouldn't miss a moment of flavor.

It is for this moment that I say no to the cookies at Craft Night; for this experience that I decline that bag of m&m's at the movie theater. This is the moment that makes all the discipline worth while. I released a happy sigh as I nuzzled deeper into my trunk and gleefully finished my sinful treat. Maybe if I wait even longer for my next indulgence, it'll taste even better.

Nah. Not possible.

*I refuse to admit that I drive a mini van*

A Political Conversation Between a 7 Year Old and a 9 Year Old

Shiney: "George Bush is retiring today."

Monkey: "Who's George Bush?"

Shiney: "Only the PRESIDENT of the WORLD, DUH."

Monkey: "Whatever."

Shiney: "Everyone is voting today. Either it will be McCain or McBama. McCain is like a great great great grandpa who had to borrow his brain. And McBama is a social-ick who wants to give our money to really poor people without asking us."

Monkey: "How do you know?"

Shiney: *with great condescension* "EVERYBODY knows."

Monkey: "Well I don't have any idea what those guys do."

*pause*

Shiney: "Ya. Actually, I don't think ANYBODY does."


This is the most honest conversation I've heard in MONTHS! Good luck today Voters.

Halloween

Halloween came and went so quickly this year, I barely had time to notice it! Yet I did still make time to attend about six parties. We did all of our usual traditions: Caramel apples, jack-o-lantern carving... but all of it was done with just a pinch less fanfare than usual.

For example, we DID go to a pumpkin patch, but it was so late in the year that EVERY PUMPKIN IN THE FIELD WAS ROTTEN! I'm talking brownish puddles of sludge ROTTEN.


Poor Squeaks.




The kid's EXTREMELY last-minute costumes were great this year. My boys wore their first-ever scary costumes, and my girl got her first NOT scary costume in several years.


After the trick or treating with my babies, my BFF and I hit up three different Big Kid's parties in Seattle. I flashed back to the 80's and spent the evening as the ultimate badazz rocker chick, Joan Jett! I rocked half a can of Aqua Net to get this look. Almost every piece of my costume was vintage, from the suede slouch boots to the authentic Joan Jett and the Blackhearts concert Tshirt. Kristen's costume was BRILLIANT: The Joker in the nurse's dress. I laughed pretty much every time I looked at her. Julia went as Sarah Palin. Her costume actually won an award at Hula Hula! She was in character ALL NIGHT with the little accent and the crooked faced mannerisms... it was scary. Much fun was had by all.


Can I just say how GLAD I am that the look of the 80's is NOT back in full force? Cuz I had NO kinda fun trying to scrape that costume off. It took about a bucket of makeup remover just to clean off my eyes. And DUDE. Don't even get me started on the SMOOTHING of the RATS NEST! HOW did they do that EVERY NIGHT?!




After all the parties, I slept over at Kristen's house where we stayed up till after 4am watching Friday the 13th and giggling. All in all, I had a sensational Halloween. But seriously... With costumes, candy, friends and parties... how could it be anything but FUN.

How was YOUR Halloween?