Five Amazing Days

All was ready. The freezer was full of frozen pizza and chicken nuggets, the pantry was stocked with a variety of cold cereal and brainless pasta dishes. That is the only way my kids will get anything to eat over the next 5 days.

I was meeting my sister in law (one of my favorite people in the world) in Utah for the BYU Women's Conference. It would be our first time going and I was excited about all the education. But I'll admit, the spring in my step was coming from the company I would be keeping in the next few days.

I could hear the echos of Jill's infections laugh in my mind as Jonathan drove me to the airport. That little premonition was bringing a surge of giddy anticipation that made my knee start furiously pumping up and down, and my shoulders slowly creep up to my earlobes.

I got a little emotional at the airport curbside as my beautiful husband took me in his arms and covered my face in slow, gentle kisses. I looked up into his amazing blue eyes as he cupped my cheeks and said,

"Remember... Focus on the message. Not on the hair."

As confirmed by the previous post, this man knows me well.

I arrived in Salk Lake City and was greeted by a large, bright sphere in the sky which, if my memory serves me, is called THE SUN.

My Jill pulled up in a borrowed car with a huge smile on her pretty face. Our first order of business was to visit some friends of hers and to fix her haircut, which wasn't nearly cool enough for a girl like Jill. And if she was going to be in pictures with me all weekend, I thought it best to take care of that little update right away. While I was at it, I fixed up her best friend Susan's hair too. Then we then drove down to Provo where we would be staying with my friend Sami for the duration of the conference. Sami also scored a haircut out of that deal. I'm just the little Hair Fairy, sprinkling superfab haircuts everywhere I go.



I sorta sprung our visit on Sami at the last minute so she had some commitments that night and had to leave us alone in her place for a few hours. I suppose it was natural for her to assume that because we are both thirty something family women that we would behave while she was gone. But when Jill and I get together it's like two 14 year olds at a sleepover. We got so loud, I'm surprised a neighbor didn't call the cops.

Jill had the brilliant idea that we should learn the dance from Beyonce's video, "All The Single Ladies" which is the most retarded video EVER... until you start dancing along! We probably did that dance fifteen times, laughing harder and harder with each take until the final run through was spent mostly on the floor in hysterics. For the next couple of hours we learned the dances from a dozen different videos, from M.J.'s Thriller to Britney's Hit Me Baby One More Time. Sami and her mom Michelle got home on time to capture our All The Single Ladies routine on film. I can't ever look at these pictures without cracking up. Though I still maintain that we looked exactly like Beyonce and her backups, even in our pj's and heels. Click on that image so you can more closely examine our awesomeness.

After a VERY late night of unrestrained silliness, we got up ambitiously early and took a cab to the conference. The whole thing was NOT what I was expecting. I thought it would be like General Conference, but with less important, more interesting speakers. Jill must have thought the same thing. Why else would we have both worn high heels? HIGH HEELS. We had to walk to classes all over campus, all day long. My shoes were patent leather with pointed toes, worn with no socks. By 5pm, I had 8 small blisters and counting. I actually took a paper towel from the ladies room and shoved it in my shoe to provide some kind of buffer, but it wasn't much help at that point. Jill's maddsexy stiletto boots were causing all kinds of problems too. So we army-crawled across campus to the BYU bookstore and bought FLIP FLOPS. Good riddance, pretty shoes. I'm getting too old for that crap.

While I was in class, I focused on the message like a good little wifey. But all bets were off on the walk to and from. The hair... THE HAIR!!! What movies and magazines are these people exposing themselves to that makes them believe this is really OK?!!! I HAD to document some of my favorites. Poor Jill had to pose for many a faux picture so I could discretely capture someone standing behind her. I admit I'm glad for the entertaining (though slightly appalling) people watching. I needed something to distract me from my feet. The classes themselves ranged between life-changingly powerful and mind numbingly boring, but all in all it was an uplifting experience. I was changed for the better and my "bucket" was filled. Now all I had to do was stay different when I got home and and splash my bucket all over everyone I know. How hard can that be.


Saturday morning, Jill and I got up early and hit up a Zumba class that she used to frequent when she lived there. I haven't had that much fun working out since... well, maybe since that last night with Jonathan, but in PUBLIC I haven't had that much fun since NEVER! I'm absolutely dying to find a good Zumba class in my area so I can go every single week.

The rest of the weekend I spend with my Grandpa and my Aunt. They both have such a soothing presence and are a delight to talk with. I got enough quiet/ reflective time to write two songs and several journal entries. With each morning away, I woke up with a bigger smile. That is more amazing than you might think, considering how physically uncomfortable I was. You see, the day before the trip, I broke out with THREE canker sores, one of which was right in the front of my mouth and shows up in all the pictures. BOOOOOO!!! On Thursday morning I woke up with a small cut RIGHT ON THE TIP of my tongue, which got worse and worse as the weekend progressed. My mouth hurt so badly I couldn't even eat more than a few bites of anything each day. As you can no doubt tell, I am NOT a fan of an empty stomach. We've already covered the multiple blisters on my feet, so we'll just move on. Thursday night at the AMAZING musical concert, a vein in my right leg EXPLODED, giving me a massive and VERY tender bruise. The next day, I went to shake the water off my razor in the shower, and accidentally slashed my thigh wide open! It was a big, jagged cut that bled for a full day and hurt like hell. And all the sitting, which I am NOT used to, built up a pretty severe stomachache that even lingered for a couple days after I got home. So knowing all that and STILL having me say it was the best getaway I've had in a couple of years gives you an idea of how much I enjoyed it.

It wasn't a perfect trip. But if I could do it all again, I would do it all the same. The only thing I would change would be how long it took me to get it up here for you guys to read! Sorry about that. I've had it written since I got back, but was having technical difficulty adding the pictures! Everything seems to be in order now so you can look forward to hearing from me more often.

It's good to be back!!!