It courses through my mind like a Hindi Mantra.
Be fashionable, but live simply.
Stop and smell the roses, but always be on time.
Be dependable, but learn to say no.
Pamper yourself, but put the kids first.
Be consistant and flexible.
Pray with him. Pray with them.
Pray alone. Then pray again.
Keep the kids groomed. Support local business.
Dote on your husband. Keep your home spotless.
Develop your talents. Be a school volunteer.
Be politically active. Build your career.
Decorate. Meditate.
Excercise. Moisturize.
Clip coupons. Read for pleasure.
Take up new hobbies. Be a good neighbor.
Do community service. Landscape your yard.
Plan family outings. Send thank you cards.
Get a degree, then go get another.
Nurture your friendships and visit your mother.
And somehow still find the time to study your religion, sleep 7-8 hours a night, eat 5-6 small meals a day, stay culturally informed, force your kids through chores and homework, put away all the laundry before it gets cold, write in a journal, and keep the championship ring for Amant Sensationnel.
It's ridiculous how many things I left OFF of this list.
HOW.
Can someone please tell me?
HOW is this done? How am I going to survive it? I think I'm slowly going mad. I hardly sleep anymore. I rarely sit to eat. I'm more organized now than I've ever been in my life, and I'm still losing things, forgetting things and running chronically 20 minutes late, which is SO frustrating! I have pages and pages of 'To Do' lists. I'll check one thing off the top as I add three things to the bottom.
I know this is the most unoriginal complaint in American culture. I know that the solution is to prioritize. But putting them in order of importance absolutely assures that the things on the bottom will never actually reach my life. There literally are not enough hours in a day to do it all! So WHAT gets left out? My home? My body? My mind? My family? My community? I'm really not OK skipping any of that!
Am I demanding too much of myself, or is this how it's supposed to be? Do men face the same kinds of challenges? Is there anyone out there who has figured out how to pace themselves to manage the weight of it all?
Someone please save me from drowning in this pile of To Do.
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14 comments:
"True wisdom consists of eliminating the non-essentials."
--Elder Uchtdorf
I'm right there with ya, sister. It's time to eliminate.
Oh my gosh. I wish I could figure it out... every evening, I look around at my semi-messy house, think about how I should really scrub down the bathroom and unload the dishwasher before bed, wonder where all the time in the day went... sigh!! Forget exercise lately. And anything else fun...
Let me know if you can figure it out :)
I'm a single mom, luv. I'm always drowning.
It's simple, really. Forget the rules, invest in the people. I only have 18 years with my daughter and then she's out the door. I grab each moment I can with her. In the end, there will always be another book, another this another that. But there will only be one moment in time with my kids and wife and family. Same for God.
well in this moment you just "voiced" what every mother feels, and that was above and beyond your duty list hurrah. Can I please repost it on my blog? Though it sees less traffic these days since I am too trying to be more organized and do all the schtuff on your list! I guess you gotta just go in cycles when you excel at one area and then move onto the next and rotate. Sometimes I wonder if I warp my kids when I forget about certain areas, but then I know how great they are...they are not going to be perfect no matter how hard I try!!! I don't know the answer....
BUT I LOVED YOUR QUESTION...it was profound!
In my case -- Hair and makeup get left out... :)
But I still have the same problem... too many to-do's.
sometimes you just gotta say EFF IT!
love you mama.
xoxo
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Sorry for offtopic
Thanks Anonymous. That's nice to hear!
Tash, I would be honored if you chose to repost my whining! I'm having the same problem of fitting blogging onto my list. Hence the 3 posts in 3 months.
Knot, that is SENSATIONAL advice. That would help put the list in order.
But I have such a hard time actually eliminating things, Melissa. I feel like they are all extremely important, and I'll deeply regret any cuts. But I can't keep up this pace. Something's gotta go. But WHAT. sigh
EFF it all! Thanks Niki, that felt good.
For me, I refuse to do it all. Not out of laziness but out of survival. I don't want a hectic life--that means I need to decide what's important enough to me to spend my time on. The rest of it, I want stillness--peace. And I put the rest away and rely on God to understand that I'm doing my best.
And I think He's okay with that.
I like the way you think, LT. I'm pretty hard on myself regarding what actually constitues "my best". I feel like there's always more I could have done, and therefore I can't honestly claim to have done my best. I guess I'm testing my limits to find out exactly what My Best looks like. Once I know that, maybe it'll be easier for me to cut out a few things.
ps. VICKI! NO cutting out prettying! :)
I have wanted the house I live in, the man I married, and the kids I am having for my entire life- this is what I've been working for, right?!?!?! Now that I have them, I don't know what to do with them. My house is eternally not clean enough. My husband gets the smallest slice of pie. My kid(s) have too much stuff and not enough me.
Personally, I just take a deep breath every morning (actually, a lot of them cause I'm a firm believer in yoga) and wear the best pair of shoes I can. Nothing seems to matter much when my feet are cute. :)
Your list reminds me of a poem you have no doubt read called "The Girl in a Whirl by 'Dr. Sue'" which ends with the following lines: "It's easy to do all the things that I do! If you plan and work smart, you can do them all, too! It's easy! she said and then she dropped dead." We definitely don't want you dropping dead. As hard as it may be we all need to remember the admonition from Ecclesiastes 3:1 "To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven." And I have to agree with Knot that this is definitely the season for your children, which certainly doesn't mean you totally ignore everything else. But things like spotless houses and folded laundry can be very low on the list. Hang in there. You'll get it figured out.
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